98. Margaret's Engagement

September 28, 1976 (U-803)

Written by: Gary Markowitz
Directed by: Alan Alda

Plot: Hot Lips, on R&R in Tokyo, phones up the 4077th with some very exciting and very secret news which she doesn't want to talk about on the phone (so why did she phone in the first place, huh?). When she comes back to camp, she reveals that she is engaged to be married to a Lt. Colonel Donald Penobscot. Burns is horrified, especially when she also tells about his sloppy surgical technique causing peritonitis. Burns starts acting very strangely (including complimenting Radar and laughing at Hawkeye's jokes!). When Hot Lips can't shut up about her new man, Burns (accidentally?) stabs her in surgery with a scalpel. He goes to apologise, but turns it into an attempted seduction. After they have a fight over the issue, Burns puts on camouflage and heads off to capture the enemy - whoever they may be. The 'enemy' turn out to be a Korean family, complete with an ox, or a band of guerillas if you believe Burns. Radar places a call to Burns's mother, and she calms him down. In the end, Burns and the boys share a rather cruel joke at Hot Lips's expense, and all is, if not well, at least better.

Glitches: This might not be a proper glitch, but Hot Lips isn't wearing her engagement ring when she's on the phone to the Colonel at the start. I suppose it might have given the game away.
The PA asks for all Doctor personnel to report to the mess tent - that doesn't include Radar, who is there. But I suppose he needs to be there to keep the minutes.
When Hot Lips gets up from the table at the end of the episode, her clipboard and tray swap hands between shots.

AWOL: No Klinger or Father Mulcahy.

Great Lines: Hot Lips: 'You've given him a few swift kicks yourself!' Hawkeye: 'Yeah, but never when he was down. Only when he wasn't looking.'
Hawkeye: 'He took his gun and his toothbrush.' BJ: 'Shooting his mouth off again.'
Burns: 'This is Major Frank Burns, who's this? ... Mommy who? ... Oh, my mommy!'
And a rather sad line; Burns on the phone to his mother: 'Well, I had this friend. And this friend only pretended to like me. You know - the way Dad used to?'

Comments: A beautiful moment - when Burns pulls the pin from the grenade and throws it away... then scrabbles to find it and put it back in! The studio audience's reaction is hilarious.
This was a very unexpected turn of events. It also heralded a trend which I call the 'Frank Burns becomes even more of a one-trick pony' trend - once he and Hot Lips stop working together, his character really doesn't have anything else going for it. On the whole, some cute dialogue, and a substantial plot, which isn't always the kind of thing one expects.

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