60. A Full Rich Day

December 3, 1974 (B-311)

Written by: John D Hess
Directed by: Gene Reynolds
Guest Stars: William Watson as Lt Smith, Curt Lowen as Col Blanche, Michael Keller as Lt LeClerq, Sirri Murad as the Turk.
Semi-regulars: Jamie Farr as Corporal Klinger, Kelleye Nakahara as Nurse Able.

Plot: Hawkeye sends another letter to his father, this time via a tape recorder, and describes activities at the camp: a Turkish soldier comes in wounded and is determined to make trouble with a knife; a Lt Smith brings in his wounded sergeant and makes even more trouble with a gun, threatening staff to get the sergeant treated; the Turk manages to overcome sedation in the OR and threatens operating staff; a Luxembourg colonel comes looking for a deceased trooper whom the 4077th gang have misplaced; Hawkeye and the Turk bond by smacking a table with knives; Lt Smith is satisfied that the doctors have saved his sergeant just in time to pass out from his own wounds; the missing and dead Luxembourg soldier turns up alive during his memorial; the Turk resists all attempts at sedation and surgery and returns to his unit, after returning Radar (who has been accidentally sedated in his place).

Glitches: Would that many fresh lettuces really just be sitting around in a MASH unit?
Radar is way smaller than the Turk - if Hawkeye's determined to offer him someone's clothes, why not his own? They're a much better match.
When Hawkeye says 'It's about a size twelve-ectomy,' his voice is missing the echo the surrounding lines have. (Alan Alda probably looped the line in later, and someone forgot to or couldn't add the echo.)

AWOL: Hot Lips is nowhere to be seen.

Great Lines: Hawkeye finishes off the long history of the tape recorder: '...Father Mulcahy gave it to me because he didn't want anybody to think he was taping confessions.'
When the Turk's waving his knife around, Klinger asks, 'Major, you wanna take away that knife of his?' Burns: 'I'm not interested in mock heroism.' Klinger: 'I'll settle for the real thing, sir.'
Burns: 'Klinger! I want to see you out of that dress! Tonight!' Klinger: 'Never on a first date, sir!'
Hawkeye: 'Thank you. I'm sure our listeners found that boring without actually being interesting at all.'
Henry: 'Oh, that's just my corporal riding around in a sheet. There's so little for the men to do.'

The Klinger Collection: A white nurse outfit with a blue and red cape. Later, a pastel blue dressing gown and a hairnet with bright pink fluffy slippers.

Je ne parle Korean...do I? Doesn't matter, really, but it doesn't seem that anyone speaks Turkish either - Radar and Hawkeye need a phrasebook. (Lucky they had one just sitting there, eh?)

Notes: Trapper (apparently) wears size 12 shoes.

Comments: Burns really has become the Major Who Cried Wolf. Everyone's so used to his exaggeration and panic, that he simply isn't believed when he runs in to tell everyone about Smith and his gun. A curious episode to use as a 'Dear Dad' - this time we only saw a minimal framing sequence (though the jokes about the tape recorder were pretty funny) - and usually the flashbacks in letters to home are more 'whimsical' things. The actual story, though, was quite good, especially some fun stuff with the Turk in the kitchen.

Previous episode
Next episode
Back to the Virgin's Guide to M*A*S*H main page
Back to episode listings