| SEASON SIX, EPISODE SIX | |
| THE REAL TOUGH BUNNIES CLUB | |
| (Fuzzy, Lucky, the Stab-Stabs, Zaire and Damnable, as we left them. ) | |
| ZAIRE: | Let's do it, bunny-boy! |
| FUZZY: | Any time, you spiky-nosed varmint! |
| LUCKY: | Verily, thou art brave, little mortal bunny leader. |
| FUZZY: | I'm the mighty Pirate King! I fear no man! |
| ZAIRE: | Rhino. |
| FUZZY: | Rhino. |
| ZAIRE: | Well, you should! I'm gonna mash ya, you furry-bunnied wimpsicle! |
| FUZZY: | En garde, villain! |
| (Fuzzy leaps at Cameroon Congo Zaire. The two fight. It soon becomes clear that Zaire doesn't have a hope of winning (!). ) | |
| PUMMEL: | Hey ... um ... should we, like, help, or something? That, um, that rhino guy, he's on our side, see, and, so ... uh ... |
| (A bolt of lightning slams down from the sky and utterly fries Pummel.) | |
| LUCKY: | Ssh. No, don't talk. |
| POMMEL: | Hey! Did you do that to my brother? |
| LUCKY: | No. It was her. |
| (Lucky points at Damnable.) | |
| DAMNABLE: | Wh -- |
| POMMEL: | You're supposed to be helping us, you naughty woman, not using the awesome forces of nature to annihilate us! |
| DAMNABLE: | You idiot! The Thunder God's conning you! |
| (Fuzzy has become quite agitated, and is beating the tar out of Zaire, believe it or not. ) | |
| POMMEL: | Don't try and weasel out of it, you harridan! I'm gonna beat the bejesus out of you now, you double-crossing harpy! |
| LUCKY: | Heh, heh. |
| (Cut to the Yoople City UBF base. Pirica, Laff, Bunniquette, Sasha, Gumman, Gumpity.They're watching the fight on a computer monitor. We can't see the screen.) | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Ouch! |
| GUMMAN: | Ooch! |
| LAFF: | Yow! |
| GUMPITY: | Golly! |
| SASHA: | Fuzzy has gone mad! He's badly hurting that rhinoceros person! |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Yeah. Cool, eh? Never did like that Zaire guy. |
| GUMMAN: | Pommel's really laying into Veronica, too. |
| PIRICA: | I'm glad I'm not a bad guy. |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | You were, when we first met you. |
| PIRICA: | Well ... yeah, but ... |
| GUMMAN: | Oh, leave her alone, Bunniquette. What did she ever do to you? |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Oh, besides trying to kill me, you mean? |
| GUMMAN: | It wasn't her fault! Now stop harassing her, or you'll answer to me! |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Catch me. |
| (Back outside to Fuzzy and Lucky. They're throwing the unconscious bodies of Zaire, Pommel, Pummel and Damnable back into the bad guys' ship.) | |
| FUZZY: | Rrright. Zap 'em back to Purgatory, Luck. |
| LUCKY: | It shall be done, little mortal bunny leader who fights like a rabid Tasmanian Devil with toothache. |
| (As he turns to walk back towards the city, Fuzzy says sternly,) | |
| FUZZY: | You don't get rabies in Tasmania. |
| (The village square. The force-field is down, the baddies are gone. Fuzzy, Lucky, Sasha, Bunniquette, Pirica, Laff, Gumpity, Anastasia, Mac, Abbie, Westminster. The Howling Nutter Monkey can be seen scowling in the background.) | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | You really showed Zaire, Fuzzboy! Good on you! |
| FUZZY: | He had to be taught a lesson. From now on, any villain who opposes us will be immediately and unceremoniously beaten to a pulp. By me. |
| (The Howling Nutter Monkey begins to snicker.) | |
| FUZZY: | Oh, shut up, you Howling Nutter. |
| (Oyster emerges from his house, and comes over, looking a little spaced out.) | |
| PIRICA, FUZZY: | Oyster! |
| PIRICA: | How are you feeling? |
| OYSTER: | Varnish the mainsails and hoist the petard, maggot-sloppers! Here comes Wendy! |
| ANASTASIA: | That good, eh? |
| PIRICA: | His weirdness seizures are becoming progressively worse. |
| OYSTER: | Weirdness? Pockets of syrup, my little goose-tumbler! Misconduct is the second cousin of poverty! Snap the harp-strings, I need to get out! |
| PIRICA: | >Sigh< ... I wish he wouldn't do this. |
| OYSTER: | Sprinkle them on the hatrack, Margaret! There goes the ... uh, the ... whoa, what happened to me? |
| ANASTASIA: | You conquered Hell, that's what. |
| OYSTER: | I ... ? Oh, dear. Yes. All that stuff with the ... and the ... oh, dear. |
| FUZZY: | Hell, eh? Could come in handy when we need to relocate soundly thrashed villains. |
| SASHA: | What is happening in this place? Hoppy's disease has come back, Fuzzy has turned into a violent maniac, Oyster is Satan's replacement ... |
| GUMPITY: | What I want to know is how Fuzzy got back to this dimension at all. |
| FUZZY: | No time for trivial matters now. We have important things to do. |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Oh, yeah? Like ... ? |
| OYSTER: | Um ... guys ... in light of recent occurrences, I think it best that I leave. |
| PIRICA: | Pardon? |
| OYSTER: | I'm the King of Hell now. I have certain responsibilities to my people. I must return to my kingdom and begin my just and noble reign. |
| PIRICA: | And what about me? You and I are in love! You can't just nick off and desert me! |
| OYSTER: | Ha! You and me in love? Don't be silly. We were never anything of the sort. I just used my powers to sidetrack you for a while and get you over your Fuzzy-fondness. |
| PIRICA: | How can you say that? I love you! |
| (Oyster snaps his fingers.) | |
| OYSTER: | No, you don't. |
| PIRICA: | No ... I don't. You're right. Okay. Have fun ruling Hell, then. |
| FUZZY: | We'll miss you, Oyst. But I know that this is something you have to do. |
| OYSTER: | Yeah. So ... um ... right. Bye, then. I'll keep in touch. Feel free to visit. |
| WESTMINSTER: | Yeah, right. |
| (Oyster summons the Stair, and hops on. ) | |
| OYSTER: | Farewell, good Fuzzyites! |
| (The Stair departs. Oyster is gone.) | |
| FUZZY: | Good. Now, on to business. Come with me, Lucky. |
| (Fuzzy and Lucky exit.) | |
| SASHA: | I wish I knew what was going on. |
| (Howie enters, carrying a letter.) | |
| HOWIE: | Mail for you, Queen Sash. |
| (Sasha takes the letter, opens it, and reads:) | |
| SASHA: | "Dearest Queen Sasha, greetings." It's from Regent Rabbitskovic! "I am writing to inform you that the Princess Disembowelled Goat - currently known as Brittany, the Bunny Messiah - has been accepted into Dennis Montalban's Highly Prestigious Boarding School For Minor Miscellaneous Messiahs. The Dean is expecting her as soon as possible. Miss Saja is invited to accompany the Princess and will be accommodated. Yours, R." |
| ABBIE: | Dennis Montalban? |
| SASHA: | The finest school in the Nerpalon System. I couldn't wish for a better education for my daughter. I must go and tell Baik-baik. |
| (Sasha and Howie exit. Cut to a meadow just outside the city. Fuzzy and Lucky.) | |
| FUZZY: | Are you ready, Lucky? This endeavour may greatly strain your powers. |
| LUCKY: | Methinks thine brother, Oyster, wouldst be better for the job. |
| FUZZY: | Nope. He's just a demon. This'll take the potence of a God! |
| LUCKY: | Tell me again what we're doing? |
| FUZZY: | We're bridging the vast interdimensional chasm and bringing to this place my One True Love. |
| LUCKY: | She's your what? Thou didst not telleth me that! What about Sasha? |
| FUZZY: | Um ... I guess ... I'll just have to break her heart. |
| (Next episode: TNG! The Teddy Uulamets Mystery deepens! The Pirate King's One True Love! Fuzzy versus Sasha! All this and more - beginning a bold new era for the citizens of Yoople City! ... or something like that.) |
Onward to Episode seven!
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Back to Season Six!
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