| SEASON A episode 7 | |
| 'What Became of Yompy' | |
| (This episode basically starts off where the last one left off, time wise, and we see Yompy the Foul sneaking down a corridor. It is all dark, and it your basic sneaky-type scenario. Next it is Gumpity's dungeon. In the corner are Mal and Hoppy, who is still in her UBF battlesuit. Yompy takes a remote control (the kind you get with those little cars) out of his pocket. Twiddling the controls, he gets Mal and Hoppy moving.) | |
| YOMPY: | Heh heh heh! (demonic laugh) |
| (Cut to the bridge. Fuzzy, Sasha, Bunniquette, Chris, Abbie, Westminster, and Gumpity are all there examining Sigma and Delta, who now resemble Lawn Ornaments.) | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Well, I didn't plan for them to wind up like this. |
| FUZZY: | That's beside the point! Why didn't you just freeze them briefly? You know they might have been able to help Mal and Hoppy, don't you? |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Oh, for Gods' sakes! You know as well as I do that I don't actually know how to use my BFD powers properly, I can only do it when I'm angry!!! How am I supposed to control it? |
| GUMPITY: | Look, let's not argue. We just have to accept that Sigma and Delta are no longer a going concern, and find out where Yompy's got to. |
| (Earless sticks his head around the door.) | |
| EARLESS: | Yoo hoo! People! I think you'd better take a look at this! Fast! |
| (The cast all poke their heads out into the corridor. There they see Hoppy and Mal lurching towards them, looking mega-hostile.) | |
| FUZZY: | Take evasive action! |
| SASHA: | Take what? |
| ABBIE: | He means leg it! |
| (They do so. Cut to the Malt Shoppe, where the whole cast are cowering behind the counter.) | |
| FUZZY: | This is all my fault! If I hadn't picked up that terrible man, none of this would have happened! |
| ABBIE: | Oh, come on, Fuzzy, don't blame yourself. |
| FUZZY: | Thanks. |
| ABBIE: | We'll do it for you. |
| (Fuzzy scowls. Everyone holds their breath as they see Yompy skip past the door, remote control in hand.) | |
| UULAMETS: | Bunniquette, this is all up to you. You and Chris are the only BFDs here at the moment, and he's... (Chris is hugging the walrus, who is looking rather bored, and sobbing hysterically) well, he's not in the best shape. Do you think you can stop Yompy? |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | I don't know! I don't know how to use my BFD powers properly. |
| UULAMETS: | You have to try. This is our only hope. I can probably help you a bit. |
| (Bunniquette and Uulamets embark into a long discussion about magic etc.) | |
| FUZZY: | You know, it's about time we had a song, just to cheer us all up. |
| GHUZZY: | You have some really stupid ideas sometimes, son. |
| FUZZY: | Dad! |
| GUMMAN: | No, actually Fuzzy is right. Psychiatrists have determined that it's moments like these... |
| (A hand comes into shot offering Gumman a packet of Minties.) | |
| GUMMAN: | No! No! I mean, at moments like these you have to keep a stiff upper lip and all bond together and never say die! All for one and one for all! |
| (The cast all begin singing 'Do You Hear the People Sing' from Les Miserables. As they reach the end, Bunniquette and Teddy finish their discussion and stand up.) | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | And you're sure it will work? |
| UULAMETS: | As sure as is possible in this uncertain world. |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Gordon Bennet! Here I am trying to save the entire show, and he's gone and got Philosophy! |
| FUZZY: | Could have been worse. He could have got religion. |
| EARLESS: | Hallelujah! I've seen the light! Let us all pray, brethren and sistren.... |
| (Abbie hits him with a large mallet. He slumps over.) | |
| ABBIE: | Don't say things like that, Fuzzy, you make them happen! OK, 'Quette, get on with it. |
| (Bunniquette stands up, as Mal and Hoppy lurch into the Malt Shoppe. Close up of her face which is a picture of concentration. She sticks out her hands.) | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | OK, guys, DUCK!!! |
| (A cute cartoon-style duck flies across the screen. There's a flash of light, which gradually clears. We see Hoppy and Mal, Hoppy still in her battlesuit, but now they have their minds back. Bunniquette looks smug.) | |
| FUZZY: | 'Quette! You did it! |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Hee hee hee! I did too! |
| HOPPY: | What on earth's been going on? |
| UULAMETS: | Well, you remember Rufus and Yasta? Y'see, they... |
| GUMPITY: | Er, I don't mean to burst the bubble, but where's Yompy gone? |
| FUZZY: | Oh, bollocks! He's still loose! |
| SASHA: | We must find Uncle Yompy quickly, or terrible things will befall! You know, he's almost as powerful a wizard as Father! |
| CHRIS: | I know! This is a job for Shawn the Super Walrus! |
| (Bunniquette hits him with a mallet.) | |
| CHRIS: | Sorry. |
| HOPPY: | Why am I wearing a battlesuit? It has got to be the most unflattering style possible! |
| FUZZY: | There's no time to explain, only don't take it off. We have to find the evil wizard Yompy before he finds us! |
| GHUZZY: | Yes. Let's go! |
| (The cast creep down the corridor towards the bridge. Hoppy and Mal still look a bit perplexed, but seem to have at least a vague idea of what's going on. They reach the bridge.) | |
| FUZZY: | If we hurry, we can close all the doors in the ship using the automatic fire door system. Abbie! Activate the mechanism! |
| ABBIE: | What mechanism? |
| WESTMINSTER: | This mechanism, Bunny-pet! (he hits a button on the console) |
| ABBIE: | Oh. That mechanism. |
| FUZZY: | Now in thirty seconds, all the doors will be automatically sealed! |
| YOMPY: | Too late, Bunnies! |
| ALL: | Yompy! |
| YOMPY: | Heh heh heh! Yes, it's me, and now I must be going. Since it is my UBF duty to destroy your ship, I must make sure I do it properly, and I couldn't bear the thought of being blown up by my own missile. Ta ta! |
| (The four chainsaws suddenly appear. In the middle we see Tessa, wearing a wizard's pointy hat.) | |
| TESSA: | Just a moment! We, the chainsaws, would just like to say that as UBF public servants we are exempt from being blown up. |
| YOMPY: | Oh, sod off! Don't think you're going to get around me with regulations and things. You'll be blown up just like the rest of your type! |
| HOWIE: | I don't think you understand what you're doing. It's against UBF regulation to unnecessarily endanger the lives of public servants, even if they are chainsaws. |
| YOMPY: | Who cares? This is my victory! I'm finally triumphing over my brother! |
| LENNIE: | No you're not! |
| (While the chainsaws have been stalling for time, the Walrus, glowing an interesting blue colour, rises up over the cast, and flops delicately on top of Yompy's head.) | |
| UULAMETS: | Tessa! You did it! Well done indeed, my son. |
| TESSA: | Daughter. |
| UULAMETS: | Sorry. It's hard to tell with chainsaws. |
| FUZZY: | Well, it looks like everything's OK again. Sort of. Anyway, this episode is going over time. Let's call it a day. |
| ABBIE: | OK, good idea. It's a day! |
| (As the credits roll, we see Uulamets explaining to Hoppy and Mal everything that's been going on. He is waving his arms around and it's possible to get a reasonable idea of what's going on. They are looking very surprised.) |
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