| SEASON FOUR EPISODE SEVEN | ||
| Part One: THE STAIR-WALKERS | ||
| (An empty blood-red void. Empty, that is, until the Stair appears, with Oyster, Hoppy, Bunniquette and Muncher standing on it. | ||
| MUNCHER: | What is this place? | |
| OYSTER: | This is the Landing. The infinite void that connects all worlds, all time, all places. | |
| HOPPY: | You mean, from this place we can access any locality or time period? | |
| OYSTER: | Wow. Cool. Let’s go to Disneyland. | |
| HOPPY: | Be serious, Quette! We’ve got a job to do. | |
| MUNCHER: | Where do we go first? | |
| OYSTER: | First, we got to the realm that lies adjacent to Purgatory. The realm of Abyssobenthia. | |
| HOPPY: | Abyssobenthia? | |
| OYSTER: | Yes. Because it is the closest world to Purgatory, it is the most obvious place to search for Fuzzy and Laff. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | What’s this Abyssobenthia place like? | |
| OYSTER: | It is a world of vast oceans, ruled by Often, the King of the Seas. If Fuzzy and Laff have entered his kingdom, he will have them safely locked up in his watery dungeon. | |
| HOPPY: | Dungeon? | |
| OYSTER: | Don’t panic. Unless they’ve really ticked him off, he won’t hurt them. | |
| MUNCHER: | Um... a world of oceans, you say? King of the Seas? Watery dungeon? It sounds as though Laff and King Fuzzy must be underwater. | |
| OYSTER: | Oh, yes, if you’re in Abyssobenthia, they’re certainly underwater. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Then, uh, might they not have drowned? | |
| OYSTER: | No. They are no longer the same as your people. For a time, however brief, they were prisoners of Hell. Thus, they are not currently mortal. The Spawn of Hell granted them eternal life, to facilitate the accompanying everlasting torture that goes along with living in Hell. | |
| HOPPY: | Fuzzy and Laff are immortal? | |
| OYSTER: | Yes. But their mortality will return to them the moment they set foot in the world of the living again. | |
| MUNCHER: | Whoa. You’re very knowledgeable, aren’t you, Oyster? | |
| OYSTER: | I learnt a lot during my decade in Hell. The Spawn of Hell Society chatter almost constantly, and when you’re imprisoned in the Pits of Hell, there’s precious little to do, save listen. Besides suffering, that is. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | So let’s get to Abyssobenthia and rescue Fuzzboy and the Dropoff! | |
| OYSTER: | Of course. | |
| (He plays a short tune on his Stair-whistle. The Stair vanishes, leaving the Landing empty. | ||
| (Cut to a seemingly never-ending expense of ocean. Water as far as the eye can see. The Stair appears, hovering a little way above the surface of the water. | ||
| MUNCHER: | What charming scenery. Love the salt water motif. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | What now? Do we have to go underwater? | |
| OYSTER: | Not yet. First we have to announce our arrival. Ahem. Glubble-ubble! Splish! Warble-ooble! | |
| (The water in front of them erupts violently and a huge sea serpent thing is there. | ||
| SERPENT: | Who dares enter the kingdom of Often? | |
| OYSTER: | You are Nemahelminthe, the Guardian Serpent. We seek an audience with King Often, | |
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | Do you now? What makes you think you are worthy, little half-demon? | |
| OYSTER: | I make no such claim. I fully realise that I am as nothing in the eyes of Often. Yet I must speak with him. Two of my friends’ companions have escaped from the Pits of Hell, and it is vital that we find them before they are recaptured by the Spawn Society. | |
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | What mighty friends you possess, to have freed themselves from the Spawn of Hell! And tell me, little half-demon, how is it that you came to possess the powers of the Incubus? | |
| OYSTER: | I destroyed the demon Inky in my quest to liberate our friends from Hell. | |
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | And you Walk the Stair. Impressive. | |
| (Nemahelminthe dives beneath the surface and is gone. | ||
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Exactly what did that achieve? | |
| OYSTER: | We’ll find out shortly. | |
| (With a large splash, the serpent returns. | ||
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | Lord Often will see you. | |
| (Nemahelminthe dives again and is gone. | ||
| MUNCHER: | Where to now? | |
| OYSTER: | Down. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | But we can’t breathe underwater! | |
| OYSTER: | The Stair will surround the three of you with a pocket of air. You need not fear. | |
| (The Stair lowers itself into the water, and Oyster and Co. find themselves in the throne-room of the Sea King. In a huge, ornate throne sits King Often: A small, cute, yet imposing and awe-inspiring fish with golden scales and long brown hair. Often is flanked by a number of armed guards. | ||
| BUNNIQUETTE: | A fish with hair. Now I’ve seen everything. | |
| OYSTER: | Bunniquette! A little respect! | |
| OFTEN: | Speak, half-demon. | |
| (Oyster bows to Often. Bunniquette, Hoppy and Muncher follow suit. | ||
| OYSTER: | I am the demon Powerbus. I seek two brave warriors: a bunny named King Fuzzy, and a Dropoff named Laff. Have these two passed through your realm, oh mighty one? | |
| OFTEN: | They have. | |
| HOPPY: | Are they still here? | |
| OFTEN: | No. They were taken from this place by a creature whose identity is unknown to me. | |
| OYSTER: | Have you any idea where this creature might have taken them? | |
| OFTEN: | None. | |
| HOPPY: | Do you— | |
| OFTEN: | I wish you well. | |
| HOPPY: | But— | |
| (The throne-room fades from view and the bunnies are now standing on the Stair in nothing more than ordinary ocean. Nemahelminthe is beside them. | ||
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | You might try the kingdom of Sceleratus. I have heard it said that Sceleratus was the destination of your friends’ captor. | |
| OYSTER: | Thanks to you, great Guardian Serpent. | |
| NEMAHELMINTHE: | Farewell, little half-demon. | |
| (Cut to the Landing. The Stair and its Walkers appear again. | ||
| HOPPY: | So, “Sceleratus”, eh? What’s the scoop? | |
| OYSTER: | Sceleratus is the Province of Darkness. The Realm of the Vampires. | |
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Cool. Always liked vampires. | |
| MUNCHER: | You mean we’re going to meet genuine haemovores? | |
| OYSTER: | Yes. We will have to petition their master, Lord Necopinus, the King of the Vampires. | |
| HOPPY: | Great. First the King of the Fish, now the King of the Blood-sucking Bat-Fiends. | |
| OYSTER: | Watch your tongue. If one of us were to offend Necopinus, we would all be killed. | |
| MUNCHER: | If we’re headed for the world of vampires, I suspect we’ll all be killed anyway. | |
| OYSTER: | Here we go! | |
| (He plays another tune. Cut to a dark, scary forest. It is midnight and the moon is full. The Stair materializes. | ||
| BUNNIQUETTE: | Creepy! | |
| HOPPY: | Anyone got any garlic? | |
| SCARY VOICE: | Ignorant mortal! | |
| (From the darkness around them, Oyster and the others see four vampires appear: a lizard, an albatross, a giraffe, and a very nasty looking dog. The scary voice belongs to the dog. | ||
| DOG: | We Dark Ones are immune to the powers of garlic! Nothing can stop us! Prepare to die! You fools will feed our bloodlust! | |
| OYSTER: | I think not. | |
| (A pair of suitably demonic-looking wings grow from Oyster’s shoulders, and surround Hoppy, Muncher and Bunniquette. | ||
| OYSTER: | I am Powerbus, Walker of the Stair. I demand to se Lord Necopinus. | |
| DOG: | Oh, do you? Ha! No one demands anything of Carthage, General of the Dark Forces! | |
| OYSTER: | So, you are the fabled Carthage? And here I thought you were nothing more than a mangy hound. | |
| CARTHAGE: | Scandun! Rone! Farbauti! Destroy them! | |
| (The lizard, the albatross and the giraffe lunge at Oyster, who easily beats them off. | ||
| CARTHAGE: | Hmmm. You are quite talented, Stair-Walker. Leave them, children. | |
| (Scandun, Rone and Farbauti return to Carthage’s side. Oyster’s wings vanish. | ||
| CARTHAGE: | Why are you here, Stair-Walker? It is unusual for a member of the Spawn of Hell to travel to the lands of Blood. | |
| OYSTER: | I am no Spawn. I am here searching for two people: a bunny named King Fuzzy, and a Dropoff soldier called Laff. The Guardian Serpent told me that they had been taken by one of your kind. | |
| CARTHAGE: | If that is the case, then your friends are beyond help. They will have been bled already. | |
| HOPPY: | You’d better be wrong, pal, or I’ll— | |
| FARBAUTI: | Dare not threaten General Carthage, little girl, or the Dark Forces will bleed you too! | |
| HOPPY: | Just try it, you deranged neck-boy! | |
| OYSTER: | Hoppy! Enough! | |
| CARTHAGE: | She’s a brave one! Never before has any mortal spoken so to a soldier of the Dark Forces. Come, I will take you to Lord Necopinus. Scandun, hurry to the Castle. | |
| SCANDUN: | Yes, General Carthage. | |
| (In a split second, the lizard Scandun becomes a bat and is gone. | ||
| CARTHAGE: | This way, Stair-Walker. | |
| (Cut to a large stone room. A banquet table fills most of the room. At one end of the table sits a tall, hauntingly striking mink. Lord Necopinus, King of the Vampires. Necopinus is drinking from a chalice filled with guess what. The corpse of a beautiful young woman lies at his feet, pale and still. Carthage enters, flanked by Farbauti and Rone, and followed by the Stair, which floats along behind the vampires with Oyster, Bunniquette, Hoppy and Muncher on it. | ||
| NECOPINUS: | Yes, General? | |
| CARTHAGE: | A Hell-Demon to see you Lord. Powerbus. | |
| NECOPINUS: | What? The Powerbus? | |
| CARTHAGE: | You know of him? | |
| NECOPINUS: | My oracles have foreseen his coming. Step forward, Powerbus. | |
| (The Stair glides forward until it is right beside Necopinus. | ||
| NECOPINUS: | Welcome. | |
| (Credits. |
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